Mishka Thundervoice
Yuppy Peasant Plus Mishka Thundervoice Of the Brown Pants the Ballista, Troubadour Extraordinaire, Tamer of That One Dragon That Attacked, Extreme Pacifist, Jester to the Royal Court, and Appointed Big Damned Hero of Ironwood, Kingdom of the Wetlands
”Something funny because I'm the Jester.”
Photo credit to Sir Denah Tugruk
Biography
RP: Mishka grew up in a monastery, and simply couldn't stand it there. He'd constantly sneak out, go to the taverns, and cause all kinds of chaos and mischief. When he was old enough, he took it upon himself to go in a "general that way direction" because he had nothing better to do. As he wandered around, he picked up stories and songs from the traveling minstrels he came across, and found a love for bow making. One day he woke up drunk on the outskirts of a growing town called "Ironwood". He figured it was as good a place as any, and decided to live there. He can now be seen screwing something up here or there in the outskirts of Ironwood, because even he knows it'd be a disaster to go into town! He's burnt his hut down four separate times through the mixing up of spells, and is currently seeking a new place to call home in the ruins of Drakenfjord (Basically, he's starting a new park in Huntsville, Texas after the old one defected).
Throughout his adventures and trials, Mishka's mental stability has slowly been breaking down. He's teetering on the edge of insanity, and every trouble pushes him closer and closer to the edge. Mishka believes he has a brother named Ghede, although it's debatable whether he actually exists.
Mundane: Mishka started playing in 2009 when Kentigern S'rendi would come to a local park to show him and his friends how to hit each other with foam weapons. He never got any credits or went to official parks because he didn't know it all existed. After a four year absence where he completely forgot about the game, Mishka came back to Ironwood looking for a place to nerd out. He enjoys entertaining the people at park and keeping everything light hearted, as you can tell by the fact that he will routinely do acrobatic flips on the field for no reason other than to make people wonder what the hell is wrong with him. He enjoys playing Bard over any other class, and will routinely cackle in glee in the middle of Kingdom battlegames after hitting some poor bastard with Lost... Mishka fully believes that Amtgard is a game. Because he believes it is a game, he believes that it should be fun. If you're not having fun, you're not doing Amtgard right. So crack a smile, kick back, and enjoy the game.
Mishka loves archery. Like, REALLY loves it. He nearly always has three or four bows on hand. He spends his free time making bows. Longbows. Short bows. Mongolian bows. Experimental bows that make you go "why?". No one has as many friends as the man with many bows.
One of Mishka's goals is to keep "The Dream" alive. Some say it's not worth it. You could say he's...a dreamer....
I'm not even sorry for that one.
Affiliated Groups
- He's part of House Draconis. He even has a tabard. And three apprentices, too.
- He's also a part of House Thundervoice. Thus, the name Thundervoice.
- Apprentice performer to Sir Scarheart
Notable Accomplishments and Related Foolery
- Restarted Drakenfjord, the Huntsville Texas park, and is currently acting Monarch.
- Voted the Flurbiest Player in all of Amtgard in 2014, along with Lord Hagar Silverdragon (tied for first place). By the time the last vote was in, the two of them individually had nearly as many votes as every other competitor put together.
- R.A. Salvatore himself (Author of the Drizzt Do'Urden books) praised Mishka's bow making skills personally. Ya. Seriously.
- He was the first Bard in the Wetlands granted Masterhood under V8 rules. He received it the day he hit fifth level.
- He can take twenty on acrobatics checks.
- Has been performing magic for sixteen years, alongside mentalism and hypnosis. He aims to get Master Dragon with these skills.
- Was the last man standing in a huge zombie vs. humans game. He only won because he climbed up a tree and hid for the entire game.
- Is the reason why Ironwood has a "No flipping or tumbling on the battlefield" policy.
- Is the only one who routinely disobeys above policy.
- Once used the incantation "The power of iceball is mine to Force Bolt!". He took a death after that.
- When he was told that the grass field was water terrain, he started swimming across the field. He got killed by a Rogue Sharknado, but kept trying anyway.
- Once made it nearly entirely through an enemy line during a battlegame before anybody realized he didn't have a weapon, himself included. He found out when he squared off against a monk and wondered why his sword wasn't in his hand.
- Jester to the Royal Court of The Wetlands, four terms in a row so far. One of those reigns it was even official.
- Was born with a natural 18 Charisma score.
- Although often confused for a human, Mishka is actually a Dire Halfling. Shutup. It's a thing.
- Almost entered a Weapon Master.
- Has an alignment of Chaotic Stupid
- Won Bardic category of Dragonmaster in the Wetlands for Reign XXXIX. He had the highest score out of any entry in any category.
- Forgot most of his other entries in said Dragonmaster.
- During the same Reign, got the highest score of any entry at the End-Reign A&S contest. 'Twas a good reign...
- In a single battlegame, had his two swords, shield, and bow destroyed by archers in one life.
- Left without weapons, he caught a javelin mid flight, flipped it around, and threw it back at the aggressor, hissing like a lizard the whole time.
- At Wetlands Reign XL Coronation, Mishka walked calmly through a battle of two teams hostile to him with his hands up, grabbed a game objective, and calmly walked right back through the middle of the fighting without being hit once. Pacifism, yo!
- Has officially been given the title "Big Damned Hero" by Pope O'Banion
- Is officially a Lord, but identifies as "Yuppy Peasant Plus". Take that as you will.
- Voted Nicest Male in The Kingdom of the Wetlands in 2015
- Voted Best Hero in The Kingdom of the Wetlands in 2015 (Although he's still fairly certain that's all in jest...like Chuck Norris jokes, or the points in Whose Line)
- Is a ballista.
- Rarely carries a weapon into battlegames. He claims it's because he's a pacifist.
- Wears different headgear to denote what class he's playing. His signature headgear is his flowery bard hat.
- Plays Doo-Dad in place of Druid.
- Started the Great Chili Debate of 2016, in which Amtgard members argued about the validity of beans in chili. It garnered over 200 comments in a week. Surprisingly, it was civil throughout the entire discussion!
- Has two 4th Orders of the Mask. He got his fifth as well, but he still has two 4th Orders.
- Plays an amazing "Scared Princess". Yes, I'm serious.
- Has a personal goal to prove that Sir Sebastian_Du_Lac is a nice guy, despite all of Sir Bas's protests and claims to the contrary.
- Currently serving as the Wetland's Guild Master of Peasants.
A rare picture of the Mishka Ballista. Photo credit to Libby Messick
