I buy garb from Cheap Places

"I Buy Garb From Cheap Places"

(To the tune of "Friends in Low Places" by Garth Brooks) By Sir Topknot

Blame it all on Amtgard
I showed up in garb
And ruined your SCA Faire
With my PVC sword
And my shield of cardboard
I was the last one
You'd want to be there
And I saw the surprise
And the scorn in your eyes
When I donned my terrycloth cloak
And I toasted you Said "To your own Dream be true" And laughed as you started to choke

• chorus*
  

'Cause I buy garb from cheap places
And I raid the dumpsters
Just to find traces of foam and pipe
So that I can fight
I don't buy stuff I can't afford
Just give me some scraps and I'll make a sword
And I buy garb from cheap places
I guess I was wrong
I just don't belong
I shouldn't expect to fit in
Everything is just fine
I'll have one glass of wine
I doubt that I'll be back again
Hey, I didn't mean
To put down your Dream
Just leave me to make my own Way
We play two different Games
Alike, but yet not the same
But you'll never hear me complain...

• chorus*
  

'Cause I buy garb from cheap places
And I raid the dumpsters
Just to find traces of foam and pipe
So that I can fight
I don't buy stuff I can't afford
Just give me some scraps and I'll make a sword
And I buy garb from cheap places

January 18, 1998, By Sir Topknot Grimwulff