Norman Wulp

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Norm of Crimson Wood, Westmarch/Dragonspine

"You had ONE JOB Norm" -Drenth

"Id like to take credit for everything, except me, thnx mum." -Norm


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Flurb Bio(Written by Leper Margin): Norm grew up in the canopy of the Canadian redwoods, which at the time was called Normandy. He was raised by Canadian beavers and learned the way of the lumberjack from them. After many years of mooching off of Canadian beavers, the beavers felt that Norm should get a job and kindly move the hell out. Norm laughed uncontrollably when he had realized he had been talking with Canadian beavers the entire time and the beavers took this as a insult and quickly ran him out of the forest canopy, which resulted in him falling from the canopy. He landed in the back of a maneur wagon being pulled by giant housecats and the wagon took him all the way to a magical place called Westmarch. The cats stopped the wagon and turned to look at Norm and told him, "Welcome to Westmarch, child.". The cats reared up on two legs and neighed like horses as they then began to gallop into the sky leaving a trail of maneur. Norm, being the normal kind of guy he was, began screaming out loud in utter horror at what had just happened...I mean...like all the first 14 years of his life had just flashed forward like some bad fast forward function on a Benny Hill video clip. He was in so much shock that he began running off into a dark wood and quickly became lost. As he finally calmed himself, he tried getting his barrings on where he was. Before his very eyes, a large flash of light pierced his eyes and a large 20 foot tall baby glowing like the sun broke through the trees to where Norm was standing. The tall baby looked down upon Norm with disgust and began to drool. "GOO GOO GAH GAH!" The monster rang out loudly with its anamilstic baby scream. Screaming filled the air as Norm began to utterly lose control of all reality. He shreiked so loud that all of reality began to crack and collapse around him. He fell through a void that eventually led him to Crimson Wood. Doctors are still treating his madness to this day...God help us all.*


  • The "Norm Complex".