Lalailom the Lusty Wench

Lalailom the Lusty Wench

By Staccatto Toccata

Composer's Note

I want to let it be known that Lalailom is a very sweet, very faithful and highly respectable woman. That's what makes this song so damn funny to me. I was originally going to write a wistful, malencholy song about her and her husband leaving the Sanctum, but she was playfully poking fun of me as I was trying to figure out chords for a song in that style. I told her that if she kept ribbing me, I was going to write a song titled "Lalailom the Lusty Wench" instead... and once I said a title like that, I couldn't help but write it.

The chorus is played after every verse, including the last one. The modified chorus is played just before the last verse and is usually good for a big laugh.

Chorus

Dm to Gm

Lalailom the Lusty Wench, Lalailom the Lusty Wench

A to Dm

Lalailom the Lusty Wench, Lalailom the Lusty Wench

Modified Chorus

Same strum pattern as the chorus, this is played before the final verse like a bridge might be

You can kiss her and hold her, Lalailom the Lusty Wench.

Spank her and scold her, Lalailom the Lusty Wench.

Verses

The first verse is sung slowly and melodramatically, playfully imitating troubadour style music.

The verses two and three are less sung and more yelled, much more in the style of a drinking song.

The final verse is sung and strummed identically to a verse from "Ballad of the Wraith" as it's a jest at Shadowraith's expense.

Verse One

(Walk Am up, from 5th string to 1st)

I dream of a fair maiden, who is both chaste and pure

Who loves me and me only, both loyal and demure.

I dream of a budding flower, untouched by any man.

But I’ll settle… for Lalailom the Lusty Wench.

Verse Two

The verse is yelled, not sung, and there is no guitar less otherwise indicated

There once were forty sailors, fresh from the high seas

Each wanted a buxom woman to give a sailor’s squeeze.

So they shambled to the tavern and ordered up some mead

To get served and serviced by Lalailom, who knew how to satisfy all their needs.

Because –

Dm

What do you do with a drunken sailor?

C

What do you do with a drunken sailor?

Dm

What do you do with a drunken sailor?

No chord

Send him to Lalailom the Lusty Wench!

Verse Three

The day of The Invasion, Lalailom was nowhere in sight

Many soldiers died that day, fighting the good fight

Sweet Lalaiom saved more lives that day then most thought she might

Ask the two dozen northern soldiers she left exhausted in the night!

Verse Four

Cut from “Ballad of the Wraith”: Four eighths of Am and two taps; four eighths of Am with a mute slap and 1 beat rest. Repeat with E. Repeat both lines again, but instead of E mute slap strum Am into verse.

Verse is four half note strums of Am, followed by four of E.

Am

A wolf came from the forest

E

On his mating prowl

Am

He eyed dear Lalailom

E

And gave a primal growl

Am

Lalailom pulled him to the side

E

And whispered in his ear…

No strum, vocal line spoken

“I’m very sorry wraith, but even I have standards, dear.”